This photo was taken by Jeanny... I have no mood to blog about the day but Jeanny Thanks for cheering me up... I'm tired... Really... When was it the last time I had rested properly... I know I'm going to flunk my exams... I have been doing other things instead of studying... And when I thought things would be better on... It just got worse... More tears... Stuff... My hands are full... When I get home more screaming and shouting... And then most of the time is on the phone... I tried my best to pay full attention to classes...Though I don't think it made a difference... I also don't want to have this terminal illness... I mean... Why is it so unfair?... Well if I did not have the illness maybe I can be normal like other people... I delude myself since I was young... Saying my Parents love me... I'm normal like everyone... I'm happy... And stuff... Well since my parents forcefully made me accept that I have the illness... What do you expect from me?... I being more than I had even thought I could be... Why can't I be happy like other people... Why can't I be wanted by my parents... The smiles all behind the pictures... They are all hiding my pain and stuff... I hate people staring into my eyes... I'm scared they see my pain... My past... My thoughts... My worries... Now I have to face more problems... I want to run away... Maybe even end it slowly... Run away from home... I'm not sure... It's painful to burden it alone... But I'm afraid to share it... Burden someone else... I'd rather suffer alone... The small little bomb in it would blow up soon... After all my life is never worthy... So why not bare the pain alone till the end?... Alone... Like always...
I Don't Want Just Anyone's Hug.♥ 1:30 AM.
