I have a tendency to break down anytime soon... I'm really worn out by many things... I admit... Yes... It's hard to know what's going on inside my head... I mean yeah... Even I don't know what's going on inside... The more I avoid it I feel smashed... The more I want to face it... I feel pressurized and breaking slowly... The more I make those paper things... I feel guilty... I go to school to pass time and keep myself busy the more I want to just tell everyone go away... At times I cross the road I want to just dash across and let something hit me... I always detested going out alone... The more I try to reason the more I feel like I'm losing my sainity... Tears rolling down one by one... Just like how the leaves fall during the third season... One by one... I wished I was somewhere in the park and then lie on the grass waiting for the leaves to bury me when I'm sleeping... Because I know that would he the place I would go when I really break and just cry to sleep... Painful memories just swept pass... One by one... Blown away like the wind when I wake up... If I really do break... I don't want to hear people saying to me not to cry... It's going to be okay... What I want is that you tell me to cry it all out and stay by my side to watch over me and hear me cry... Until I stop then you can ask am I okay and stuff... *drip...drip...drip* one by one these little red dots would flow... Drip on to where I'm standing or sitting one by one... And when they touch the ground they would be like rain... Splash upwards and land in a neat circle... And I'm there crying and looking at my life wasting away... No need for the ambulance... Same goes to my asthma... There's no need... It's not like I will die... But even so... -sigh- why waste your time on me?... You know I can go like the wind... And never return... I should have just never walk this earth... I shall make myself useful when I'm still alive then...
I Don't Want Just Anyone's Hug.♥ 4:39 AM.
