I Don't Want Just Anyone's Hug.♥ 5:48 AM.
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Tuesday, August 19, 2008 at 5:48 AM
The least for that someone is just to hold me tight and never let go of me... Yes it's the least he could do for me... I always wanted to be held on... but never was I held on... never once... Hiding in my own pathetic delusion of how the world is suppose to be... Thinking... Laughing... Smiling... Hiding my emotions... Yeah... I do agree that the three most hardest things to say is... I love you... I never dared to say it to that special someone... I am sorry... Sorry to those I had offended... Help Me... I never seek help until lately my " Little Daddy'' Roy told me that I should start blogging... The special someone, the people I offended or the people who encouraged me may be looking at this right now... My sincere feelings towards him, my sincere apologies and also my sincere Thanks to those who know they are the Three categorise people. People like My Jie... Kor... Little Daddy... Friends... Doctor Lionel... Mrs Koh... and the rest of alot of people... Always wanted to be held on... Yeah it's stupid... I know... but I only want to held on nothing much... After all that person I am sure he is very reliable... But it might take me sometime to overcome the shock if he ask... because never expected him to ask... and I guess I would be happy... But I really think it's those kind of One- sided affair... So slowly trying to get over it but whenever he around... I just don't understand... I never did understand myself ... Yeah it would be hard to understand... That's cause I am mostly lost in my thoughts... yeah most of the time it's me and my thoughts of a delusion world of how it is supposed to be like even when it is not... Yeah all a Delusion... 100% he does not know, realise, or maybe he just acting blur... dunno if this going to lessen the pain or actually cause much more pain to me... but I know little or more its still going to hurt unless another delusion... or he really makes my dream comes true... but I don't what it to be another delusion I want it for real... But out of 100% only like 0.01% he will ask... yup... I don't need flowers... Presents Chocolates or whatever the Stead gives... those are not important I only want it simple and lasting... but the things I want is his values and his concern, care and everlasting love... I am sure he can give me what I need that's why he is ... Special... Remember I said it's the least he can do... Just by holding me in his arms and never let go of me... The least... Never let go...
To You I'd Be Always Faithful.♥ 5:48 AM.
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