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Tuesday, March 3, 2009 at 10:43 PM
Hm... I... Well had lunch today... Not typical though... But it was great... I had planned it yesterday and well could not wait to eat it the next day... I was with Stacia... She wanted me to walk back home with her... Because she found that sitting in my car being driven home is well... Embarrassing... So I told her I needed to go to the convinence shop which was quite out of the way... So yup we went there... She wanted me to buy a 10k cash card for her... So she stuffed the money in my hand and mutter... About wanting to buy sweets... Maybe she feels embarrass in playing such games... Hm... So yup... Got my food... Then I was about to go when I remembered... My house did not have an microwave... Well... That's partly because my parents rarely cook... It's the chef who cooks our dinner... And yeah... They eat their lunch by their own... While I got to find my own... So leading to our kitchen not used... And therefore... When my sister used the microwave it blow?... Lack of usage... And therefore leading it to be discarded... And so... I had to use the microwave there and well the food was still warm when I reach home... Yummy... I still remember when the chef and cooks were in a week holiday we had to find our own food... That was when I was freaking happy... No more of his cooking for a week!... Sad to say... I grew tired of eating his food... And well... I don't know how to bake or cook... Baking... I know alittle... As for cooking... I know nuts about it... But I help to cook a traditional dish before!!! And the house hold did not well say it was bad... But to me it was delicious!!! Heh... Second brother is learning how to cook... And I must say he bakes nice muffins... I'm gonna try his cooking if I get to go over when he is the one cooking... I'd rather study then cook... My oldest brother was telling me how bad I would make as a house wife next time... ... ... ... ... ... ... He says that a girl should learn how to cook... ... ... ... ... Well I'm sorry... I don't know how to cook and I don't really like cooking... ... ... Well... Yup... I knew it... God my marks are like... I drop alot... I'm doing very badly... Though yeah I know why... But I guess I would have to work very hard to get back to my position and to be better... And so... Yup... I think this is my first few time eating lunch this year... I usually skip lunches... Even when there is training... The last time I ate I think was that time Danna wanted me to get something to eat at the convenience stall... Yup... I had to write some thing for this week upcoming international women's day... Well I did... I drew something and well it was only a drawing... Its not even like it's going to fill the whole paper up... It was only a drawing... I don't know how to design at all... So I could not do fanciful writing... I don't draw like nice hearts or able to decorate the paper... Not like others... They draw and design pretty well... It was so plain... It was graded... I had to do... But the thing was... We had to give to someone we admire/love/special... Mostly people would give to their mums... I was like the only one not knowing who to give... Actually I knew... But it would seem wrong in a way... So I just scribbled some words... I could not design... So it was only words and a drawing... Of just a girl... Not special at all... It was mostly the drawing that I look at... The top was plain just a few word on a piece of paper... That's all... When I get it back... I'm not going to give to anyone I guess... I'm gonna tear the top if I did give to someone... And so... Life... Seems so much quieter now... It seems like during that period of time again... I knew that this would come again... No sooner... It's getting much more peaceful... It has a different feeling from last time... In a way that I would rather this then last time... But it's not that... It's different but both has their own advantages and disadvatages... There are still vivid memories... And scars from last year... It's very vivid that it could actually just seem like yesterday... I can remember the conversations... How the way I wasted my life... And much more... It was a mistake... Everything was a mistake... Yes it was a mistake... Me being in this world was a mistake... Me being imperfect was a mistake... Me doing things wrongly was a mistake... Me having asthma and stuff was a mistake... Me and my results were a mistake... Me choosing wrongly was a mistake... Me meeting some people was a mistake... Me spending so much money at the doctor's was a mistake... Me doing almost everything was a mistake... Me smiling was a mistake... Me being able to actually you know... today did not rain it was a sunny day... and whenever i look up at the sky... i had this voice in my head... wanting to tell you... "the sky I'm looking at now... is the same sky that you might be looking at too ... just that we are separated from day and night... one day I'm sure we would be looking at the same sky ... at the same time whether its day or night..."
To You I'd Be Always Faithful.♥ 10:43 PM.
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